It’s the 8th. Things are supposed to be getting back to normal.

I still don’t have internet. More of the saga happened – I’d had the install booked for the 5th, Friday, for a month now since the original offer of it being installed today caused me to melt down because why should we have to wait a month? So, come Friday morning I’m waiting around as confirmed by several text messages when I’m contacted to say it’s being rescheduled for the 17th.

Yeah not happy. The extra two weeks was one thing, but also having already been waiting that morning, with all the texts from TPG and NBN making sure someone would be there in the previous days. Oh and they’d direct debited $75 for the month that morning too!

So, I don’t think I actually cried this time, but I spent an hour on the phone to them, and then it was booked in for 8-12 Saturday.

Come 11:30 Saturday morning, the NBN the calls me himself to say he’s definitely coming today and he’s text me himself to say when he was on his way and to ignore the text that was just about to come through sayng he was on his way then.

So, 3.45pm he arrives. Pleasant fellow, I made sure he’d had his lunch break before he got to work.

Installed the NBN box inside the house, but no, I still don’t have connection because the fibre to the house has to be laid. Sometime this week or next I’m told. He couldn’t do it because there was asbestos in the pit and he didn’t have the certification.

They’ve credited back the money hey took Friday – only as account credit I really could have used the cash – but yeah no offer of regular broadband FTTC or anything. So I wait some more.

Bruce has given me his second monitor so I can do dual monitor internetting – mostly having a stream in the second window, currently BlizzardGurrl. Go say hey, she’s moving house this month and it’s her birthday!

My UA got registered so we need to put that up for sale. Spent some time decorating the Corolla more, Bruce is spending time trying to sort out HIS car. he stove got replaced on the weekend too so I can now cook up a storm lol, still need new pots.

Slowly slowly trying to get back  into routine. Have Everyplate coming today, so I’ll have that planned out for me again. Bruce son is staying a couple of nights, so I’ll expand tonight’s dish with extra taters, and I’m off to Sydney tomorrow to meet Mel from twitter so the boys can sort out their food tomorrow night, there’s still chicken burger patties from last night.

I have a psychologist appointment Thursday – we had one in Dec then the move was on and so we arranged for after new year. This one is free for me, so that’s the main reason I’m going. Back to Antabuse group Friday, I hope everyone made it through sober and safe, Xmas is always a risky time. I need to work on not overreacting to criticism again.

I’ve been tired and may have a scratchy throat but since that happens to me anyway when I’m anxious about something I’ve been doing RATs which are negative and will mask up and play it as it comes tomorrow, I don’t wanna get my friends sick!

Israel bombed a hospital, she exclaims as she returns to the dishes

Senator Fatima Payne: The killing of innocent civilians in Israel should be condemned and we condemn it. The killing of innocent civilians in Palestine should also be condemned and we must condemn it. The international community loudly and proudly condemned Russia’s occupation of Ukraine when it started attacking Ukraine in 2014 yet today the world watches as the state of Israel deprives the entire population—men, women and children—of the basic necessities of life: food, water, electricity, gas and medicines. We must condemn it.

Israeli missiles strike residential dwellings, civilians, multistorey apartments, health facilities as well as places of worship, indiscriminately killing men, women and children. We must condemn it. Human Rights Watch confirms that Israel is using white phosphorous in Gaza. That violates the international humanitarian law prohibition. We must condemn it.

The price tag of Israel’s right to defend itself cannot be the destruction of Palestine. Israel’s right to defend its civilians cannot equate to the annihilation of Palestinian civilians. I hereby call for an immediate ceasefire to come into effect, alongside many world leaders and experts. Food, water, medicine and humanitarian aid need to be allowed to get through and reach the victims. Mediation and talks need to start, as obviously violence has not solved anything for the past 75 years, and a just and long-lasting solution needs to be sorted out.

I roll some more marbles, drop some more fantasy units in the games that I play quite passively with twitch streamers, in the other window I scroll through tweets, playing speeches by world leaders, interviews of ordinary people. People excuse the genocide of the Palestinian people, saying they literally did this to themselves, of course.

I just want to buy a Palestinian flag marble, there’s an Israeli one. Consume my way through this. Like buying a Kuffiya with purple in the weave to wear this summer to keep the sun off my pale skin, Or in solidarity at at Rally, a rally they try to scare us off from going to with threats of random searches or fines and imprisonment. Because order is more important in so-called Australia than justice, be it social or climate. Keep the peace, keep the status quo, however racist that may be.

Israel bombed a hospital. 500 to a thousand people dead. Patients, homeless, internal refugees, doctors, nurses, teachers, the disabled who had nowhere else to go.

But what if Hamas were hiding under there?

What if?

Whatif Hamas were hiding in your town. Holding a meeting at the Workers Club, storing weapons in the highschool hall. Sure, wipe out your city, your town, It’s for the overall good, what’s 500 more brown lives.

Oh but this is where I have to condemn Hamas’ attack on Israel, and the kidnappings of Israeli civilians. And I do. Hamas should not have done that. They should also not have been able to sneak in under the gaze of the most technologically advance military in the world. Australia buys its Centrelink surveillance tech from Israel, they don’t need our military aid.

Hamas aren’t the good guys. But neither is the state of Israel.

(I pause to hang out my washing inbetween rain showers)

I curse that the kids bring out all their plates and cups to wash at once, but am pleased to have running water to wash with, food to feed them, a safe place for them and the baby to sleep. “First world problems” we say as we deal with out day to day mental health or cost of living pressures, holding baby Emery tight while babies are bombed evacuating as directed by their oppressors.

We voted against the Voice to parliament. The least we could do, give Blak people an advisory voice to the colonial government. My electorate voted over 70% no. I’m not surprised. One booth, Wollombi, yoted majority yes. I voted yes in a referendum we shouldn’t have had a say in.

But what do you expect? They say the voting pattern was similar to that of the 1999 republic vote that I missed out on by a year, the same seats leaning yea and no, The spread very similar, the same people voting for the status quo. The same people being blamed for being uneducated and poor, The same people being fundamentally happy with being a British colony, and even if we do think we should move forward from that, it’s not the pressing thing that people who are living day to day care to debate.

Yes, we are a racist country. If was the racist no, not the sovereign no, or the disengaged no that won on the day. You see this here in the gloating in the facebook groups, the Blak kids being followed in the supermarkets, the white people claiming they’re just as discriminated against as Aboriginal people.

But the disinformation comes through. I was waiting at the foodbank for the afternoon free pies, there was a small group discussing the referendum and how the new world order had something to do with it. How Covid was a conspiracy to make someone money, how this one guys was beaten up in school by black kids so that means they can’t be racismed against.

“It’s okay to be white” was a motion in our parliament, just as “Israel has a right to defend itself” too precedence over condemning their war crimes. Nazi’s in Melbourne get an armed escort home on the train while they harass and intimidate anyone not white. They take the chance to yell anti-Semitic slurs and graffiti while also calling the Palestinian protestors terrorists.

I just go back to making my cupcakes and doing my little chores.

Making my little family’s life worth living.

lemon cupcakes